OMG...ROFLMAO

[Rebel]

Funniest thing I have heard on FBHW in a long time happened 11/1. I'll keep the backstory as brief as possible, but it's needed to set up the funny:

Zane has been having problems with his new cat crapping all over the house. After some discussion and calls from listeners, he concluded it might be that the cat is scared by the furnace. The litter box is in the same room, and the problem started happening when the furnace started coming on.

He called Diana during a break to ask her to put a second box near the bar area for the time being, so the cat would have another place to go until they have a chance to figure things out. Zane thought it was a simple and reasonable request, but was surprised when Diana objected and what he thought would be a 30-second conversation ended up taking the whole break with no resolution.

At first, Diana didn't want to move the box at all and was not convinced that the furnace noise was the problem. Then, she moved on to not wanting the second box located where Zane wanted to put it.

When Zane said, "I don't understand why this is such a difficult request," Free Beer replied: "Diana's probably thinking the same thing right now. She probably doesn't understand what your deal is."

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Zane:

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"HOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW?!!!"

[potthole]

I was one of the callers to help give advice to Zane.

[Rebel]

Nov 2, 2011 20:37:19 GMT -5 potthole said:

I was one of the callers to help give advice to Zane.

Oh, yeah, you must have been the pheromone guy. Good call, good advice!

If we were playing Scrabble, I'd bust you for "upsetness."

[potthole]

Total brain fart led to that gem of the English language. Was thinking of using a different word but my mouth failed me.

[The Biff Lebowski]

This sounds eerily familiar to what goes on at my house. A simple request turns into a major cluster foxtrot.

My wife hasn't spoken to me in 36 hours because I simply asked her to not call me 45 minutes after I leave the house to go to the store. This happens all the time. In her mind, she's just making sure I'm okay. In my mind, she's being needy and smothering.

I asked nicely for her not to do that. Now I'm an asshole.

Sheesh.

[Rebel]

Nov 3, 2011 6:50:11 GMT -5 The Biff Lebowski said:

This sounds eerily familiar to what goes on at my house. A simple request turns into a major cluster foxtrot.

My wife hasn't spoken to me in 36 hours because I simply asked her to not call me 45 minutes after I leave the house to go to the store. This happens all the time. In her mind, she's just making sure I'm okay. In my mind, she's being needy and smothering.

I asked nicely for her not to do that. Now I'm an a-hole.

Sheesh.

I'm sure your wife is a wonderful person, but that would be a problem for me, too, if it was a regular occurence. I have a friend whose wife is the same way. If he and I are off doing something together, she will call him multiple times over the course of just a few hours. More than once, the first call has come between the time we walked out of his door and when we got in the car! If a man did that to a woman, her friends would label him a controlling jerk.

There are times when my empty house gets a little too quiet, but one major advantage is being able to go where I want, when I want, without having to explain myself. My cat doesn't like it when I leave, but he doesn't know how to use the phone, so it's cool.