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Post by Fistor on Jul 14, 2008 9:51:59 GMT -5
I fell down my basement stairs this morning.
I can't remember the last time I fell down the stairs. I don't even think I've ever fallen down stairs when I was drunk before. I did fall down a flight of three stairs when installing a screen door once, but I landed on my feet on that one.
Not so this morning. One second I was standing at the top of the stairs with my clothes in my hand, barely awake, ready to go take a shower, the next I was lying in a heap at the bottom of the steps shamefully aware of what a fucking moron I must look like. I was on my back, after having jiggled my fat ass all the way down the (thankfully) carpeted steps, my back in the first stages of feeling much rug burn pain, in nothing but my underwear, which miraculously stayed on. No injuries to report, other than I might be just ever so slightly uncoordinated. And the rug burn. Which hurts like a bitch right now.
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Post by Dino on Jul 14, 2008 9:56:41 GMT -5
I fell down my basement stairs this morning. +1 Cause that made me laugh! ;D |
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Post by The Biff Lebowski on Jul 14, 2008 9:57:49 GMT -5
Larry's red thing distracted you, right?
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Post by Fistor on Jul 14, 2008 10:04:28 GMT -5
Larry's red thing distracted you, right? I tripped over it. Also, I have not revealed that story here. So no one understands what you're talking about. Not that they can be torn away from humping their screens in the sex thread or anything. So I guess it's no big whup. |
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Post by Queenie on Jul 14, 2008 10:05:11 GMT -5
I fell out of the bathtub a few weeks ago. It was Saturday night and I wanted to take a shower before I went to bed. I had a little too much to drink and I was trying to find a razor and decided not to step out of the tub but just lean over the side cause the sink was right there for me to hold on to (but it's hard to hold on with a wet hand . . duh), and my foot slipped as I was getting the drawer open, and I just plopped right out onto the floor, but not before gashing my torso on the shampoo bottle on the side of the tub. I still have a scar from that.
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Post by The Biff Lebowski on Jul 14, 2008 10:07:25 GMT -5
That's one long run-on sentence there Queenie!  |
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Post by The Biff Lebowski on Jul 14, 2008 10:07:45 GMT -5
Also, I have not revealed that story here. So no one understands what you're talking about. What story? |
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Post by Fistor on Jul 14, 2008 10:12:09 GMT -5
Also, I have not revealed that story here. So no one understands what you're talking about. What story? It's a story about my dog. It's pretty focking epic. |
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Post by Queenie on Jul 14, 2008 10:12:24 GMT -5
That's one long run-on sentence there Queenie! I said was a little tipsy. You know when you're drunk, you seem to remember each and every detail (most of the time) and things kinda happen in slow motion. I felt that if I didn't include every detail, you would feel like you were there!! |
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Post by The Biff Lebowski on Jul 14, 2008 10:13:54 GMT -5
What was the razor for? |
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Post by Queenie on Jul 14, 2008 10:15:19 GMT -5
What was the razor for? Uh . . . to shave. |
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Post by The Biff Lebowski on Jul 14, 2008 10:17:20 GMT -5
Oh, I thought you meant the phone.
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Post by Queenie on Jul 14, 2008 10:19:41 GMT -5
Oh, I thought you meant the phone. Yeah . . . i was gonna take pictures!! LMAO!! |
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Post by plungerhand on Jul 14, 2008 10:32:11 GMT -5
Oh, I thought you meant the phone. Yeah . . . i was gonna take pictures!! LMAO!! Don't worry, I took plenty. Still can't figure out that photo pail thing. |
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Post by Queenie on Jul 14, 2008 10:39:56 GMT -5
Yeah . . . i was gonna take pictures!! LMAO!! Don't worry, I took plenty. Still can't figure out that photo pail thing. Don't you dare! |
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Post by potthole on Jul 14, 2008 11:58:04 GMT -5
A couple weeks ago my wife and I were with some friends tubing. When I was done I puked. I find it rather embarrassing that all it took to make me sick was to drag me around behind a boat while grabbing for dear life to an inflated piece of rubber.
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Post by Peachs on Jul 14, 2008 12:01:09 GMT -5
A couple weeks ago my wife and I were with some friends tubing. When I was done I puked. I find it rather embarrassing that all it took to make me sick was to drag me around behind a boat while grabbing for dear life to an inflated piece of rubber. I once barfed after skiing (for the first time) |
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Post by plungerhand on Jul 14, 2008 12:09:58 GMT -5
Several years and a thousand beers ago, I got up in the early hours of the morning to use the bathroom. This was before I/we had any children and it was still safe to sleep in the buff, or so I thought. In my drunken slumber, I made a right instead of a left into the bathroom. I awoke on the front porch, peeing in the shrubs. Of course, the front door locked behind and I was forced to bang on the windows in an attempt to wake my sound asleep wife. She finally answered the door, but not before at least 2 different neighbors got a good laugh.
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Post by Queenie on Jul 14, 2008 14:01:44 GMT -5
. . . it was still safe to sleep in the buff . . . . . . as if you don't now?? |
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